When you blow a candle on your birthday, remember that you have to grow up. So, today being International Women day, as women, we need to grow up! No more whining and complaining. No more crying and sobbing. Let’s make the decision to take charge of our lives, and our future, and be mature. Nature has taught us that human beings bodies need to grow and change as time goes by. Why do we expect less of our inner being? If we grow old, but our inner being does not grow as well, we might start experiencing some sort of dysfunctions, as there will be an inadequacy between the mind and the body.
What’s the difference between a child and an adult?
1. A child cries when he wants something. An adult expresses his desires through a precise question.
Woman, when you want something from your partner, husband, colleague, or friend. Express clearly in a specific request. Stop complaining about it, stop being angry about it, stop whining about it. I understand that it might be difficult for you to express it calmly and neutrally. But you need to let go of your emotions & calm down. Say it with audible and clear words! Expressing exactly what you expect from the other person.
2. A child is fragile and has a low resistance to pain.
Imagine a child hurting himself, falling down or cutting himself. What does he do? He starts crying and the pain is unbearable to the point that he needs comfort straight away from his mum and dad. For the same cut, or wound, an adult would not react the same way, as he is more able to resist pain.
Woman, when you are hurt, shaken, upset or frustrated, please pool yourself together. You need to stop crying at some point, and get hold of yourself. Your resistance to pain should be higher to that of a child right?
3. A child is carefree, without a thought for the future. An adult is aware of the future and what he needs to do to secure his future.
Have you seen a child worried about what he’ll eat the coming day? Never. He expects his parents to take care of that. Sometimes, we behave as children, and expect others to provide for us, most of the times, the men in our lives: Dad, boyfriend, fiancé or husband. As long as you take care of someone, and provide for the person, you may tend to think unconsciously that that person is a child in some way. Many times, the men in our lives tend to think that way, because we lead them to by expecting care, just like kids do.
Woman, grow up. Take care of yourself properly. And accept present from the man in your life as gifts and not compulsory care
4. A child is naïve, he believes everything. An adult is mature. He knows and faces the truth.
One thing that’s amazing about kids is their ability to believe everything. They believe that fairies exist. They believe in A father Christmas flying around the world to distribute things to kids. They have imaginary friends, and never dare telling them that all of this is an illusion, they might hate you forever. Many of us adult women, are just like kids. We refuse to face the truth even when that truth stares at us. Why? Because we are scared that truth will hurt us and destroy the beautiful lie we chose to believe in. And we carry on living trying to make the lie become truth, and ending up hurt, upset and frustrated when finally the lie is revealed.
We need to grow up and become mature enough to face the truths in our life. It’s the only way to find solutions for lasting peace.
5. A child needs constant affection and love to be happy. An adult creates his happiness and does not depend on others to be happy.
That’s one of the hardest part of being an adult. Not having everyone around you giving you kisses, care, gifts, sweets … that feeling of being the centre of attention is a treasure, isn’t it? You recognise women who miss being the centre of attention by the sadness they feel when they feel neglected. If you do not call them on their birthday, they get upset. If you do not kiss them goodbye when leaving home in the morning, they can’t work all day. If you do not greet them when coming in a room full of people, they tend to think you ingored them on purpose. Pretty exhausting, isn’t it? Well, the 1st thing you notice when you become an adult, is that you won’t be the centre of attention anymore. And if as an adult woman you can’t bear it, maybe you need to grow up some more.
6. A Child complains about everything, an adult communicates and expresses his emotions
Emotions, emotions! If you want to know how mature a person is, just observe the way he manages his emotions. A child does not know anything about emotions control. When he is sad, he’ll show it straight away by keeping to himself. When he is hurt, he’ll show it by crying. When he is angry, he’ll show it by yelling and when he is fed up, he’ll show it by slamming the door. He will just let the emotions tell him how to behave, because emotions are a way for him to get what he wants. An adult on the contrary can communicate and express himself. So instead of following his emotions, he knows how to control himself and express his feelings with words, not attitudes and reactions. That’s the only way for an adult to get a message across.
Woman, if you notice that you are often misunderstood and people have difficulty understanding you, ask yourself whether you’ve kept the emotional language of kids or is expressing your feelings as an adult, with words.
7. A child is capricious. An adult knows exactly what he wants, and how he wants it.
Have you ever been out with kids. In a ice cream store, they’ll tell you they want strawberry ice cream, and 30 seconds later, they’ll change their mind and ask for chocolate instead. At the cinema, they’ll tell you they want to watch Cinderella and 1 minute later they’ll change their mind and ask to watch Ice age.
Woman, please take some time to think about what you want in a relationship, in a man, in your business, or what exactly you want to achieve in life. Otherwise, you’ll be just like a kid, not knowing what he wants and changing your mind one season after the other. That’s what maturity is all about.
8. A child only thinks about playing and toys. An adult thinks about working and tools to build his future
Sometimes, you may encounter some women who are just like kids. The only thing they thing about is playing, shopping, jumping all around, and buying some more toys. They tend to think of themselves as toys, or dolls. They do not think much about work. How can you build a future for yourself when working is not a priority?
To all women out there, let’s grow up to create the happiness we are looking for. To all men who are reading this, please do not take this as an excuse to continue being distant and detached towards the women in your life.
Written by Dorcas Manou Lasme Adou